Brilliant Thoughts of Insanity

Here comes another drainage of my mind:

I want to write page after page on how disliked I feel.
How awkward I feel, how unwanted... How I always feel like I'm in the way.
About how I wish someone, anyone, would want to listen to all of my self-pitiful, brilliant thoughts of insanity.
But just writing these few lines are making me want to vomit. I'm sick to my stomach of being self-centered and feeling sorry for myself. But I am, and I do!
I could, seriously (!), sit down and write an autobiography, if I wanted to. Fortunately I am still (for now) able to see how extremely boring an autobiography this would be, but that is how immersed with myself I am!

You know those movies/TV shows/stories where some bitchy person is approached by a guardian angel or a ghost or some sort of supernatural being who takes the bitchy person along to the future or to other places or whatever, in order to provide some perspective on others and their lives?
That's what I need... Someone to show how great I actually have it, so I can't help but appreciate everything I have and am.
Maybe I should go to some developing country where people are suffering and dying, and see how they are still more satisfied than me.
Or I can just sit around and wait for that ghost to come and give me some perspective.

Oh, and I want two or three lizards. And an apartment with room enough for a really big terrarium!